Not to belabor a subject, but there is one memory I want to share.
I'm not sure how old I was, but I'm guessing somewhere around 5.
My family had taken a trip and I can't remember all the places we went or the ultimate destination, though it may have been Disneyland, however the memory I'm thinking of pertains to something that was bought at Magic Mountain.
There had been a stand there at the park selling blown glass figurines. Boy oh boy I loved those. Delicate, glass, sparkly, cute.
I apparently found one I really liked and I'm guessing the parents bought it for me because I don't really remember much about that part.
But what happens is, after we're home from the trip, I wanted to go next door to show the neighbor lady my special new figurine that I had got from the trip.
I don't remember anything about what happened next door, but I'm sure the neighbor made the appropriate oohs and aahs.
What I remember is, that coming home, and walking up the path to our front door, I dropped it.
Well, I was so upset. My new special sparkly glass ornament and it was broken.
It wasn't in a million pieces or anything, I think just a piece or two had really broken off, but it seemed unfixable and ruined.
But along with the sadness that I broke it, came a fear that I would get in trouble for breaking it.
This wasn't due to anything except being a kid and not realizing that this wasn't the end of the world for everyone else, that this didn't cost as much as a car and wasn't as precious to everyone else.
I'm sure in my mind, the thought was that kids get in trouble when they break stuff.
This has nothing to do with my folks, they didn't do anything wrong, but I guess stuff just seems overwhelming when you're little.
I think, though I'm not certain, that I tried to hide the fact for a little bit that I broke it but I'm a little hazy on that part.
I just remember walking up the path and dropping that shiny thing.
Hubby thinks that the reason kids remember bad memories is because perhaps emotions are stronger when we're young, in terms of not really knowing how to deal with those emotions.
It's easy enough to be happy and there's no problem with that, but little kids aren't really equipped to handle a lot of other emotions I think. It comes with time and as situations arise.
So perhaps, though of course I had many happy memories in childhood, perhaps I don't remember them as well is because I didn't know how to deal with the others, and so they stick out.
Of course I love my folks and this isn't a reflection on them at all. I know that I had many good times as a kid. I just wish I could remember more of them.
:::
Forecast is for 77 degrees today. Supposed to continue to warm up until Saturday when it's supposed to hit 91 degrees. Yikes!!
I'm definitely ready for some low 80's, but low 90's? *sigh*
Hopefully at least we've seen the last of the sand storms. If it's going to be hot I'd prefer not to be eating sand as well.
Not enough rain this year. I doubt we'll get any more at this point until the end of the year now. Wish we had had some more.
Alright, on to today's log. There is only one more after this.
:::
Friday, February 4th
Up at about 1 p.m. Seeing the news on al jazeera, 100's of thousands of people, maybe a million or more, gathered peacefully in Tahrir square. Chanting and cheering and milling around. Happy to see that there is no violence, same as before, until the police and thugs and pro presidential people got involved. I wonder how long the people will stay there?
Some of the things that I've read about from local ex-pats include having trouble finding atm's with money. I'd say over 99% of them have been out of cash for days. There's trouble getting fresh fruit and vegetables, and apparently the gas stations are out of gas. Many stores remain closed. Not sure how long all this can continue to go on and what will happen if it continues.
I still don't feel very safe to go outside but I think I was really just overwhelmed last night with too much news and getting a bit over fearful from all of the news. Feeling overall better today, just still not sure it's very safe for me to go walking around. Have heard of foreigners getting attacked in different areas of cairo by plain clothed police or others.
2:45 helicopter making rounds nearby
3:45 another round of helicopter
5:00 gun shot?
5:45 tank?
6:20 helicopter
Much more traffic out tonight judging by the sounds I can hear, though there should still be curfew in effect. Not normal traffic by any means but it's been so quiet at night lately that it's a noticeable increase.
8:40 helicopter
9:20 helicopter
10:03 helicopter
10:42 helicopter. i think it's making a continuous run around here somewhere.
3:25 It was fairly quiet tonight. Until about 45 minutes ago. There are a couple of cars nearby who have been honking back and forth for some time now. There's no pattern to it, so I don't know if it's a couple of kids just being irritating or what. There is also a lot of noise that reminds me of scavenging somehow. Not sure how to describe that but just odd noises. I don't think there's been as many people out at all tonight down on the street, for guard duty or otherwise. I think everyone wants a night inside. Maybe the fear of the thugs has died down, or maybe they're just worn from caring.
I have a deflated feeling, like somehow "we" have failed in our objective to get the president to leave. I know that this is a process and it takes time but I guess that myself and probably others as well felt a big lead up to today, hoping that there would be some sort of decisive outcome. No such luck.
I'm hoping that my hope will spring back eternal in the morning, after a night of sleep. Hubby asked tonight if I wanted to go back to the States for a month or two, but I would just worry about him if I was away, and we can't afford the trip anyways. He thought the embassy would pay for it, and I told him that they are only shipping people off to Greece or someplace nearby, not back to the States. And I think you have to pay them back anyhow.
Maybe, despite all the difficulties we would face in the States, we should think about heading that way to live. It remains to be seen what will happen to business here, and in particular hubbies business. I'm torn about living in either place, not completely satisfied with either.
And I really wish those darn cars would stop honking. lol
3:51 Honking be darned, it's time for sleep.
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